Cher: Hey! Dionne: Oh no Ms. Stoger, I have a note from my tennis instructor and he would prefer it if I wouldn't expose myself to any training that might derail his teachings. Hi, Daddy. Cher: Bye, Daddy. Edit. Tai: Am I some sort of a mentally challenged airhead? My first book is Fit Or Fat. Cher: Yeah. I'd have to get off the freeway. So i figure these grades are just a jumping-off point to start negotiations. Yeah. Elton: That doesn't make any sense. I swear I'll concentrate! Dionne: So check it. So we decided to show Tai the ropes at Bronson Alcott High School. You think I'd give alcohol to teenage driver taking my daughter out? I want to burn it because I'm so over him. Elton: I knew it I knew it when you kissed me. Josh: Mel. Cher: Isn't my house classic? You haven't made me watch The Real World. Cher: That's right. Elton: The picture you took is in my locker. Elton? “Clueless was the quintessential ’90s movie, so I don’t know how they are going to reboot it for today,” a Metro staffer who has Clueless on DVD says. Cher: Whenever a boy comes, you should always have something baking. Ok it gives her a sense of control in a world full of chaos. Cher: It was really decent of you to dance with Tai. Cher: I will. This is, like, Josh. I swear to God, woman! Cher: I object! Cher, you don't understand. Cher: Well, did I set him back? 98 in Geometry. Breathe. Mrs. Geist: Popular uprisings from estates to the general assembly! The topic is Haiti, and she's talking about some little party. Elton! The cops usually break them up in less than an hour, and it takes that long to get there. When I get married, I'll have a sailor dress, but it will be a gown. Who makes sure that Daddy eats right? I can't pinpoint the spirituality. Travis: Yeah. Relax, relax, relax. She didn't mean any harm. Mall Guy #1: Hey, man, we're just joking. Dionne: He does like to shop, Cher, and the boy can dress. Cher: Listen, Tai, when we get there, make sure Elton sees you, but don't say hi first. because it was a sit-down dinner. SCENE IV - CLASSROOM DEBATE MR HALL Should all oppressed people be allowed refuge in America? Mel: Oh, Josh is in town. Look, I'm really sorry. Where's my white collarless shirt? Mel: What for? Those are the scariest kinds of lawyers. If I ever saw you do anything that wasn't 90% selfish, I'd die of shock. Why not? # I can feel the heat? Look at Geist. Dionne: Tai, so anyway, have you ever done it in water? I was sitting there. Cher: Travis, we've got it under control! You've got something going for you that no one else in this school has has. Before Christian tells Cher … Daddy! Josh, go to the party. You don't want to start off on the wrong foot now, do you? Silverstone just didn't know how to pronounce the word, and Heckerling decided to leave it in the movie. I failed something I couldn't talk my way out of? 6 of 12. next View All. Read Later. You can't hang with them unless you own a BMW. Mel: Tell me the problem, and we'll figure out how to argue it. MOST POPULAR. I'm totally buggin'. Cher: It would be dope if we got some really delicious take-out. Josh: Actually, I'm going to a Tree People meeting. Elton, comments? Cher: I like this boy, and he likes someone else. Cher: Let's get Christian and go. Cher: O.K. Mel: Oh is that so well, not around here you can't. Attorney: Mel wanted them tonight. The bag, too. That's it. Josh: What's your problem, man? Cher: I am rescuing her from teenage hell. Categories: Entertainment. Cher: Hey, Elton's over there. You could do so much better. She is so cute. Lucy, where's my shirt? Elton: Fine. Mr. Hall: So this must be the elusive Christian. Movie Scripts > "C" page 58 > Clueless (1995) Clueless (1995) # Looking out a dirty, old window? It's up to $200. Mel: Cher, I expect you to walk in this door in 20 minutes. thats it. SCENE XV - MAKE-OVER AT CHER'S HOUSE "Supermodel" Jill Sobule (Various scenes of Cher and Dionne making over Tai, then Cher and Tai working out in the lounge room) CHER. Christian: He's absolutely right. But people came that like, did not R.S.V.P. Go shopping. Rate this script: (4.00 / 8 votes) Amy Heckerling An alumna of both New York University and the American Film Institute, she directed the commercially successful films Fast Times at Ridgemont High, National Lampoon's European Vacation, Look Who's Talking, and Clueless. Cher: Dionne and I were both named after great singers of the past who now do infomercials. I'll get you a beer. Cher: Oh! A Fun Waste Of … Come on. You want to go? There's Elton in the white vest, with all the most popular boys in the school. Like I would really wear something from Judy's. Tai: Cher, ain't that the same dress that you was wearing yesterday? It's amazing the things you pick up when watching a scene 50 times. And Clueless has proved its longevity once again, with one clip in particular circulating recently on social media. Cher: Mr. Hall, the buzz on Christian is that his parents have joint custody. This is so not fixable. I realized how much I wanted a boyfriend of my own. Cher: So ok I was at this party, and my designated driver tried to attack me. um...Uh, th...You're... youngand beautiful and... Josh: Mmm... yeah, a little. Tai: Oh, right, right. Attorney: If you hadn't have been playing footsie, she wouldn't be bothering me. That's not what I meant. Christian: Like Saturday. Cher: Daddy it's from the Cut Your Cholesterol Cookbook. Josh: Ya, you know I think I'd really like to check out environmental law. Dionne: Oh well we do lunch in 10 minutes. Cher: I felt so satisfied, I wanted to do more good deeds. Cher: Sure. All rights reserved. That takes care of our minds and bodies, but we should do something good for mankind or the planet for a couple of hours. Josh: No, that you found someone even more clueless than you are to worship you. You're only hurting yourself here, baby. Mel: We're gonna have a nice family dinner. Dionne: And this tiny little waist. Now be sure to go and watch it repeatedly. Tai: Mine is Men Are From Mars, Women Are From Venus. Cher: But, Tai, do you really think you'd be good with Josh? Try to remember to bring our textbooks. I am so glad you're here. TaI: All right. I am majorly, totally, crazy in love with Josh. Murray: I don't know where that came from. Or Dionne and Murray, when they think no one is watching, are so considerate of each other. He's really funny. And that's the Persian Mafia. Cher: From now on, we're alternating Cindy Crawford's Aerobicize and Buns Of Steel and reading one nonschool book a week. Anyways, I got the tape, right? Breathe in. Then this guy with a gun held me up, took my money and my phone, and he yelled at me, and forced me to ruin my dress. Josh: It's an entirely different country. Cher: I can't believe I failed. Cher: Travis, Tai would have wanted you to enjoy the party. Josh: I can't believe I'm taking advice from someone who watches cartoons. Finally. Tai: If I'm too good for him, then how come I'm not with him? Closer, Tai. Tai: No. He just broke up with Folette! Tai: I don't know, like...stuff. Dionne: Oh get over it ok. Ms. Stoeger: Thanks for the legal advice. Travis: Oh, well if girls did it, what would guys do to impress them? Cher: Look, there's Mr. Hall. Tai: Do you think we could do it next Monday? For whom did you practice this wondrous talent? I drive really good, usually. Nice pile of bricks you got here. Cher: No. Couldn't take him anywhere. I'm going over to Melrose with Amber. The columns date all the way back to 1972. Cher: The midnight snack totally revived the lawyers, and Daddy was way grateful. Cher: You're going to roam around campus by yourself? Murray: What? She is so adorably clueless. Christian: They're charging for brewskies. And I went, 'No!'" Amy Heckerling. Want to practice parking? Dionne: Including my boyfriend. And you lose weight by doing it like this cutting it small. You did wonderful. Let's just talk when we've mellowed, all right? Cher: That's Ren & Stimpy. So until mankind is peaceful enough not to have violence on the news, there's no point in taking it out of shows that need it for entertainment value. Cher: Oh! Have your old room. As if! Let's blow off seventh and eighth, go to the mall, have a calorie fest, and see the new Christian Slater. Isn't there somebody else I can talk to? Mel: I'm not offering. It's not like he'll sleep. Seeing herself as a matchmaker, Cher first coaxes … Boy at Lunch #1: Excuse me. Summer: Hey, Cher, is it true gang members tried to shoot Tai? Mr. Hall: Yes, well, it's a little off the subject of Haiti, but tolerance is always a good lesson. Oh, shit. Dionne: Cher's got attitude about high school boys. My father's going to go ballistic on me. Elton: You know, you're one of my best friends, and I do not have friends that are girls. Cher: O.K., O.K., so he's kind of a Baldwin. Cher will be pro. Then he goes and blames us. Josh: How much fun would it be having a brother-type tagging along? I have been going down a shame spiral. But some people are all, What about the strain on our resources? Uh, but I would like to say this. And with that in mind, I'm going to distribute your report cards. Driving Test Administrator: Girlie, as far as you're concerned, I'm the messiah of the DMV. Everywhere you go has valet. Tell me more. O.K. Tai: Ugh, Cher I don't want to do this anymore. Elton: My foot hurts. Cher: Anyway, why should I care what Josh thinks? Murray: Look at the number on the top. This shit is whack. This is a good learning experience for me. I feel like my after school commitments aren't good enough. But some people are all "What about the strain on our resources?" And even Fabian, my masseuse, said I had a lot of tension in my back. Tai: You're entitled to your opinion. It might stunt my growth and I want to be 5'10 like Cindy Crawford. Cher: Oh, it's too late now. I had to haul ass to the kitchen, redistribute the food, squish in extra place settings. I told my P.E. No! Then I glance at my blind spot. Attorney: I'll get killed 'cause she's a moron. I'm toast. Josh: Look, I got to get back to school. Monologue from the film "Clueless" by Amy Heckerling. Dionne: Stop. Cher: Well, my ex-stepbrother's friends are having a party. Get out of the lane! © 2021 TIME USA, LLC. The entire script to Clueless including important actions, songs from the soundtrack, and my own personal comments. I'm Audi. Tai: Like, little things, you know? Wah wah wah! # I search for the beat in this dirty town? Thanks to an 1815 novel, an iconic 1990s teen movie got its structure. Attorney: What happened to the August 28th files? Tai: That was so cool the way you did that. I feel like such a bonehead. I sent myself love letters and flowers and candy, just so he'd see how desired I was in case he didn't already know. Cher: Like some kind of present or something. Even Lucy, our maid, is terrified of him. Straight off right he offers me some smoke. Cher, you'll come with me. Tai: I know exactly how that feels. Try and use it in a sentence today. The one that Elton and I danced to. Her in-class debate speech, taking the affirmative on whether all oppressed people should be allowed refuge in America, makes artful use of metaphor in comparing party-crashers who didn’t ruin her father’s big 5-0 to refugees seeking asylum. Cher: I mean mystery as far as everyone's concerned, you're the most popular girl in your school. Claes Oldenburg. Cher will be pro. Tai, this is Josh. There he is! What do I do, Murray? at Script City ($) Clueless Transcript at archive.org; Note: Multiple links are listed since (a) different versions exist and (b) many scripts posted become unavailable over time. Murray: With your head, not the whole car! Mr. Hall! more…, All Amy Heckerling scripts | Amy Heckerling Scripts. Unlike some people I know like Shawanna. The topic is violence in the media. You notice how wine makes people want to feel, like, sexy? 25 Feb. 2021. Come in, Cher. Then suddenly... Oh, my God. Wait a second. Ugh. Cher: Oh, I'm having a Twin Peaks experience. She died when I was just a baby. And in conclusion may I please remind you that it does not say RSVP on the Statue of Liberty? Dionne: Cher she is toe up. We truly appreciate your support. Dionne: Well at least I wouldn't skin a collie to make my backpack. But speaking of vehicular sex, perhaps you can explain how this cheap Kmart hair extension got into the backseat of your car. Crossword Newsletters. And to tell you the truth, I'm not sure I want you with a stupid fellow. Cher: You look like Forrest Gump. Well, um, I guess kitchenware? Also, sometimes you have to show a little skin. Yeah, Jake. Patrons were greeted at the theater door with giant infl atable “mobile” phones and brightly colored, fl uff-topped ballpoint pens. Dionne: Tai, I thought we moved on from there. I mean, I get up, I brush my teeth. What is it about college and crybaby music? Did I stumble into some bad lighting? she said. Cher: Calm. CHER: "So, OK, like right now, for example, the Haitians need to come to America. Cher: Excuse me. Would you call me selfish? Well, it has officially been 25 years since Clueless was first released and honestly, most of us are still totally buggin' over it.Clueless is the type of movie that completely defines a decade.If anyone born past the year 1999 wants to know what things were like back in the '90s, all they'd have to do is watch Clueless and they'd get it. Cher: I divided them into entrees and appetizers. He's got no cause for complaints. You looked hot in it. Mr Hall: Should all oppressed people be allowed refuge in America? Well, I hope you enjoyed the script. Do you guys want? Dionne: Is Josh giving you shit because he's in his postadolescent idealistic phase? Yuck! Clueless (1995) Movie Script. I'll have them picked up. Amber: As if! Mel: The ticket is the first notice. I just wanted to see if you need any help with anything. Josh: You got your whole social world going on. Hang with us. Travis: Hey, could you shove down a little bit? Please! Ya know. He gave me a C-minus. Meanwhile, back at school, everyone was talking about Tai's brush with death at the mall. I think we both know what it feels like to be lonely. All right. I had no idea he was so motivated. mugging scene was … Our stock would plummet. Clueless Script - 1995 Draft at IMSDb; Clueless Script PDF at Script Fly ($) Clueless Script PDF - REVISED SHOOTING DRAFT. Mel: What do you mean it's not ready yet? TV: Singer of songs. You said Jose would do it. Cher: Ha ha! Amber will take the con position. Josh: Ha ha ha! Dionne asking Tai for sex advice? Dionne, you're up. You need some excitement in your life. Mr Hall was based on a real teacher. Get back in the car. Random Party Guy: Wow! Clueless, which turns 25 this week, is actually a remarkably faithful Austen adaptation. Cher: So, O.K., you're probably going, Is this, like, a Noxema commercial or what? Monologue from the film "Clueless" by Amy Heckerling. Clueless Script - 1995 Draft at IMSDb; Clueless Script PDF at Script Fly ($) Clueless Script PDF - REVISED SHOOTING DRAFT. Cher: Oh, yes. There are no scenes that are joke-less. Cher: But it's Dionne. Cher: Some people aren't lucky enough to be as naturally adorable as you are. I'm here with you. From the soundtrack to the pop culture … Dr. Lovett's coming by to give you a flu shot. Right before you die, your mind just sort of gets very clear. Wasn't my mom a Betty? Talk to someone in his eyeline preferably a guy. "Clueless" Scripts.com. Act like Travis is saying something funny. Cher: Let's do a lap before we commit to a location. Cher: Actually Cato that's exactly what it means. Dionne: And besides it's just local loadies. She couldn't make him happy. Travis: Oh you like them I was thinking it was too cluttered. I'm just a ditz with a credit card? See sporadic means once in a while. Looks like we're going to have to make a cameo at the Val party. Alicia Silverstone, Stacey Dash, Donald Faison, and the rest of the cast reunite and discuss how ''Clueless'' redefined the teen comedy Cher, two minutes. Where's your report card? You know what? Amber: You were thinking about what was really important. Heather: The man is ridiculous. What do the number on the top... Dionne: There are no numbers. I really hate that. How many girls can say that about you? Dionne: When we got back from the IHOP, it was 8:00. It's my most capable-looking outfit. And he's a hideous dancer. You know, Rollin' With The Homies. Are you O.K.? Mel: What are you doing dancing in front of my office? Murray: I'm here with you. PHAT! Alicia Silverstone in Clueless, 1992. You want to come? Josh: What the hell are you talking about? Look at the genre output from the 1980s to the 2000s, and female screenwriters are rare; female directors, even more so. ScriptVOX Studio is easy to use text-to-speech software for writers that can open up a new window on your creativity. I doubt anybody would miss you. https://americanrhetoric.com/MovieSpeeches/moviespeechclueless.html You have to clean them and feed them. Cher: When I saw the sparks between Tai and Travis, I knew Josh was out of the picture. Josh: Hey, James Bond. Cher: You have pretty eyes. Love was everywhere, and even though I was alone, I was really happy for Tai. And don't try sneaking out of the office. There will be some great parties. Cher: Sorry to make you leave. Of course, there was always Miss Geist. Pass me a fin, I'll pay you back? Principal: Ms. Stoeger...got another one. Cher: Dee, when your allergies act up, take out your nose ring. It is one thing to spark up a doobie and get laced at parties, but it is quite another to be fried all day. Then Dee and I had to design a lighting concept. Your dad is pretty scary. Dionne: We're on the freeway! This is an Alaia. I don't remember getting a first notice. Travis Birkenstock... 38 tardies. Mel: Cher, I expect you to become a good driver. Oh, my God! Cher: That is stupid. Tai will go with Summer. Well, it was a good learning experience. I'm going to walk Heather to her door. How did you do? Go, go, go. You should try the dorms. # Outside the cars in the city go rushing by? Cher: Let's see who's available? Tai! Tai, go with Summer. And popular and, uh, and...but this is not why I come here. That was a big mistake. Well, it's the same girl." 0:14. And so I picked Clueless which seems like a weird movie to pick because it’s not on its surface a gay movie, but what I argued in the show notes for it is that true to its … O.K. It will get easier. But technically, I am a virgin. And could the suicide attempts please be postponed til the next period. I can't believe I went off the way I did. I mean, there's so much work to be done, and he can't afford to lose that time. From the movie Clueless - Cher (Alicia Silverstone) starts to fall for Christian (Justin Walker) in class and gives a presentation on violence in the media. Amber: Mr. Hall, how can I answer that? And cover it up with a backwards cap, and, like, we're expected to swoon? Cher: Oh, sure you can. # When I can't remember, it irritates me? A night alone with Christian? There was just one person left to call, and I really, really didn't want to call him. You have to calm down, O.K.? Cher: Well we did our best. VIDEOS GALLERIES. I didn't know you could get tickets without a license! Mr. Hall: What do you mean? So I said we'd go out to Malibu. Cher: Whatever, I am going to take that lost soul in there and make her well-dressed and popular. Let it out. I didn't even have a speech prepared. Attorney: She just set us back a day. All right, Cher! I had two bowls of Special K, three pieces of turkey bacon, a handful of popcorn, five peanut butter M&M's, and, like, three pieces of licorice. Come here, Tai. Dionne: Jeepin'. In America, we drive on the right side of the road. I said R.S.V.P. Josh: Don't worry. Pretty random fiesta. I don't want to be a traitor to my generation nd all , but I don't get how guys dress today. Mr. Hall: Thank you for that perspective, Cher. Cher: God no. Cher: That I am devoting myself so generously to someone else? Christian: Come on. CHER. That's disgusting. Elton: Great. What class you going to? Right before the yearbook pictures? Tai: Cher you look much better in that dress. From far away, it's O.K. I'm going to practice real hard. And my buns they don't feel nothing like steel. Mel: At least he knows what he wants to do. Where's your sense of good hospitality? And I pick out my school clothes. Daddy, did you ever have a problem that you couldn't argue your way out of? Baby, relax. I mean, I'm kind of having a personal problem. Let's play suck and blow. Cher ends up with it.) Christian: Ooh. Cher: O.K., you guys, all get together. Tai: Man, I'm freakin'. Nothing like that. Josh: You're not letting her go out like that, are you? But seriously, I actually have a way normal life for a teenage girl. And poor Miss Geist, always trying to get us involved no matter how much we resist. The attorney general says there's too much violence on TV, and that should stop. Mel: Come on, you chuckleheads! STANDS4 LLC, 2021. You're great. We don't have any tea, but we have Coke and stuff. Cher: Actually, you can take Wilshire to Canon, and that turns into Benedict. I mean, making you worry like that. Mel: How can you say that? The "This is an Alaïa!" We're friends, right? Dionne: What do you care what he thinks, Murray? O.K. IN FOCUS: Clueless O n June 2, 2013, some friends and I attended a “Quote-Along” event for Amy Heckerling’s 1995 fi lm Clueless at the Alamo Drafthouse Cinema in Kansas City. Christian: So was the red. Truck! Sometimes they come to class and say bonehead things, and we all laugh, of course, but no respectable girl actually dates them. Amy Heckerling (born May 7, 1954) is an American film director. Driving Test Administrator: Watch out for the bike rid... Driving Test Administrator: What are you doing? In case you've never heard of that, a contribution is... Cher: I have donated many Italian outfits to Lucy. # But it's soothing? An alumna of both New York University and the American Film Institute, she directed the commercially successful films Fast Times at Ridgemont High, National Lampoon's European Vacation, Look Who's Talking, and Clueless. It has been more than 20 years since "Clueless" hit theaters on July 19, 1995. Josh: Not if they're going to finish those depos. Feel free to share our short scripts with your creative colleagues. Rhetorical Analysis of Cher’s class debate in Clueless Rhetorical devices as a method to persuade the listener or reader are presented in nearly every piece of literature and media expression. Come here. Web. So, uh, what did you do in school today? Where are they? Cher: So the flannel shirt deal is that a nod to the crispy Seattle weather? I gave it to the studio and said, 'Think of this girl when you read it,' and they said 'Oh, Liv Tyler?'
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